FELIZ AÑO NUEVO

We're raising a glass at the offices of The Steaming Poop blog and toasting a fond farewell to 2009, with the wish that 2010 will be much more prosperous.

I THINK YOU ALL KNOW WHERE I'M GOING WITH THIS

So Tiger Woods commits adultry and loses his endoresment deals. Charlie Sheen is arrested for Second Degree Assault, Menacing, Domestic Abuse,and Criminal Mischief against his wife, yet his commercials for HANES UNDERWEAR are still airing?

Hmmm.

AND THEN A HERO COMES ALONG

Ivana Trump, my new hero, was escorted off a plane in Florida after becoming "belligerent" when some children where running up and down the aisle and screaming. She (rightfully) yelled at the unruly brats for their behavior and then began to yell at the flight attendants, who attempted to calm her down. Ms. Trump was asked to leave the flight and when she refused to leave the flight voluntarily, she was escorted off by Palm Beach County sheriff's deputies.

Huh?

When I first heard this story, I was left with two questions: Why weren't the parents of these germ-spreading, seat-back kicking booger machines taken off the plane as well (or instead of), and what's Ivana Trump doing flying commercial?

THE CURSE CONTINUES

Web-based sales of the iPhone have been halted in New York City. Reports claim that cellphone towers have reached their limit, although there are also reports of high fraudulent activity regarding online orders. New York City iPhone users have long complained about the large amount of dropped calls and slow downloads.

Long-live the curse, HEH!

SO HARD TO SAY GOODBYE

Flight of the Conchords will not be returning and I'm having a hard time with that. At least Mel will live on in reruns, right?

PICTURE THIS

Took a ride along Highway 1 today and stopped to take this dramatic shot of the Lighthouse at Pigeon Point.

MY CHRISTMAS SLEIGH

My car rental reservation was for a Mazda 6 (or similar), so when I arrived at Hertz, that's what I was expecting. When asked if I was a Hertz #1 member, I replied "No." After giving the agent my credit card and driver's license, I was informed that I was, in fact, a Hertz GOLD member (not sure how that happened). As a member, I was entitled to, and given, a HUGE upgrade.

The Volvo S-80 is what I rolled out of their garage in, and it was so choice!

Merry Christmas to me.

OH CHRISTMAS TREE, OH CHRISTMAS TREE

Happy Holidays from the staff of The Steaming Poop blog.

COOKIE AND IRVING'S CHRISTMAS SPECTACULAR

Cookie and Irving recently shared a nice evening at the Castro Theater, where they enjoyed a big screen viewing of the Alfred Hitchcock classic, PSYCHO. It may not be the most conventional film one would see during the Christmas holidays, but so what. It was, once again, a chance to see a true classic the way it was meant to be seen -- on the big screen.

As much as I enjoy DVD's (and the extras that come with them, especially with classic film releases), there is nothing like seeing an old film in a movie theater (the way it was meant to be).

FORGIVEN

We're at that time of year where the media reminds us of moments over the last year that scared us, touched us, enraged us, or just made us stop and think for minute.

One of those moments that has stayed with me is from Michael Jackson's public memorial, when his daughter, Paris, got up at the end of the memorial to tearfully say:

"I just wanted to say, ever since I was born, Daddy has been the best father you could ever imagine. And I just wanted to say, I love him so much.”

In a single, heartbreaking moment, his daughter rehabilitated his image and made him human again.

Even my cold, dead heart was moved.

WHITE MEN CAN'T HUMP

There is an interesting article in New York Magazine on the effects of men who subsist on a steady diet of porn. It seems the more porn they (or we, I should say) watch, the less good in bed they (we) become.

Fortunately, this hasn't happened to me.

At any rate, the Naomi Wolfe article hits the nail on the head with a paragraph that I couldn't agree with more:

" . . . pornography works in the most basic of ways on the brain: It is Pavlovian. An orgasm is one of the biggest reinforcers imaginable. If you associate orgasm with your wife, a kiss, a scent, a body, that is what, over time, will turn you on; if you open your focus to an endless stream of ever-more-transgressive images of cybersex slaves, that is what it will take to turn you on. The ubiquity of sexual images does not free eros but dilutes it."

HEWLETT-PACKARD DOESN'T LIKE BLACK PEOPLE

(The following is from an MSNBC article I came across and thought I'd just cut and paste here because it's pretty funny and too large to rewrite on my own)

HP has new software that allows its PC webcams to track faces. That means when you're talking to your friends and family across the miles, you can move about the frame and the camera will follow you . . . Unless you're black, it seems.

A customer named Desi and his coworker, Wanda, demonstrated the flaw and posted the video on YouTube. It's pretty funny, but a slap in the face for company.

"As soon as my blackness enters the frame, it stops tracking," Desi says on the video.

Desi invites his coworker, "White Wanda," to enter the camera frame. Sure enough, the camera follows her around as she moves. "I'm going on record and saying it: Hewlett-Packard computers are racist," Desi said with a laugh.

Unfortunately, HP isn't laughing. Instead, they're taking the lesson and plan to make changes. In a blog entry on its web site, the company's "lead social media strategist" addressed the issue:

"Everything we do is focused on ensuring that we provide a high-quality experience for all our customers, who are ethnically diverse and live and work around the world. That’s why when issues surface, we take them seriously and work hard to understand the root causes. We are working with our partners to learn more. The technology we use is built on standard algorithms that measure the difference in intensity of contrast between the eyes and the upper cheek and nose. We believe that the camera might have difficulty “seeing” contrast in conditions where there is insufficient foreground lighting."

SKYJACKED

The Department Of Transportation announced today limits on how long airlines can hold passengers hostage on delayed flights. At two hours, they must begin to offer food and beverage and if that delay reaches three hours, they must allow those passengers to de-plane. Fines of up to $27,500 per passenger can be levied if airlines violate the new three hour rule. Also, they must keep lavatories operating and provide medical attention when necessary. Airlines have said they will comply with the regulations.

Do they really have a choice?

These rules, which go into effect in 120 days, are LONG overdue and we at The Steaming Poop blog applaud them. It's amazing that, from a simple customer service standpoint, the airlines were unable (or unwilling) to give into common sense and implement these rules (or something similar) on their own.

SHORT DAY

Happy Winter Solstice from the staff of The Steaming Poop.

PICTURE THIS

I came across this lone Winter Krokus while on a hike through the Marin Headlands, yesterday morning.

HEARST IS ROLLING OVER IN HIS GRAVE RIGHT NOW

Once a great newspaper, The San Francisco Examiner has been turned into a ridiculous free rag that now litters our streets. This is the view of the sidewalk along 15th Street between Landers and Dolores this morning (and every sunday morning). This has to be stopped! No one reads this shitty paper anyway.

I'VE GOT 10 INCHES FOR YOU

Oh to be in New York City right now. Ten inches of snow fell over night and there are few sights more beautiful than the city under a blanket of fresh powder.

WHILE THEY WERE AT IT, THEY SHOULD HAVE BOUGHT THE BROOKLYN BRIDGE AS WELL

I'm questioning the logic behind San Francisco agreeing to purchase Treasure Island from the U.S. Navy for $105 Million.

The plan is to develop the former site of the 1939 World's Fair into a new neighborhood with up to 6000 homes, a 60-story tower, and a commercial town center with ferry access. Aside from the fact that this is a 100-percent landfill island and isn't the most seismically safe place to be building homes and skyscrapers, didn't Governor Schwarzenegger just announce a few weeks ago that because of global warming, this site would be under water within a hundred years anyway?

CONCRETE JUNGLE WHERE DREAMS ARE MADE OF

Grew up in a town that is famous as the place of movie scenes
Noise is always loud, there are sirens all around and the streets are mean
If I can make it here, I can make it anywhere, that's what they say
Seeing my face in lights or my name in marquees found down on Broadway

Even if it ain’t all it seems, I got a pocketful of dreams
Baby, I'm from New York
Concrete jungle where dreams are made of
There's nothing you can't do
Now you're in New York
These streets will make you feel brand new
Big lights will inspire you
Let's hear it for New York, New York, New Yoooork!

-- Empire State of Mind, Part II - Alicia Keys

I couldn't have said it better myself. Thanks, Alicia, it's a GREAT song.

HAPPY BICENTENNIAL

200 entries and still going strong.

WHAT DO YOU CALL TWO GAY GUYS NAMED BOB?

Oral Roberts, televangelist, dead today at 91.

Good.

SOOOOOOWEEEEEEE

The CDC has announced a recall of hundreds of thousounds of H1N1 "Swine Flu" doses. Turns out that what was sent out isn't as effective as originally thought.

What a shock! Everyone was Soooo concerned about "the children, oh the children, won't somebody save the children" that they didn't stop to think about how safe AND effective this vaccine really was, considering it was rushed through production.

FLIGHT DELAY

Two years after it was supposed to premier, the new Boeing 787 "Dreamliner" is set to begin it's first test flight later this morning. The 787 is a plane that is made of composite material for better fuel efficiency and is also snapped together.

I was once VERY excited about this plane (especially when I saw pictures of what the First Class cabin was going to look like), but I'm VERY weary about getting on a plane that has been "snapped" together like a toy model.

THE SCARLET LETTER

Back in the day, the state of New Hampshire punished "Adulters" with such amusing little deterents such as standing on the gallows for one hour with a noose tied around their neck (yikes), 39 lashings with a whip, or simple cash fines.

Now that gay marriage has become available in the state mentioned above, state legislators are working on repealing their 200-year old adultry laws.

I wonder if Tiger Woods is glad he doesn't live in New Hampshire right now?

IT'S A BAD "GOODFELLAS"

However, Sharon Stone is a revelation in CASINO.

I SAW A RAINBOW ON AN OTHERWISE CLOUDY DAY

I can't think of anything much nicer than watching an old movie the way it's supposed to be seen - on the big screen of an old theatre.

BACK TO THE FUTURE

When I first rocked the Ray-Ban Wayfarers back in 1985, they were $50 a pair. I just bought a new pair at Neiman Marcus for $189.

Wow, talk about inflation.

I know it's a bit of a price increase but this particular model is handmade in Italy, the lenses are polarized glass, square-cut, and I can't wait to get them on!

FEED ME, SEYMOUR

This WAS the Pot Roast I had at Chow (church street). It was pretty damn good.

PICTURE THIS

I took this picture last weekend. Even though it's San Francisco, it kind of has a european feel, doesn't it?

BOUN APPETITO

I recently had the pleasure of dining at DELFINA. My friend Steve was in town from New Hampshire and we both love this place.

We started off with the Hafner 2003 Cabernet Sauvignon. This a wine that I have in my collection already and is, without a doubt, the BEST "cab" I've ever had.

I ordered the Meyer Ranch Hanger Steak (rare) and substituted the French Fries with the Olive Oil Mashed Potatoes. I couldn't recommend a meal more highly. It's always so nice to find a restaurant that does "RARE" right. The mashed potatoes were smooth and sublime and it's a recipe that I would LOVE to crack.

Our meal was topped of with the Warm Tcho Chocolate Torta with Olive Oil Gelato and Maldon Sea Salt. The dark chocolate morsel was so rich and delicious that I nearly sprayed my shorts at first bite.

Although reservations are STRONGLY recommended (we arrived around 6:30pm without one and the place was PACKED), we were happily (and quickly) accommodated.

FOR THE BOYS

I came across this picture of screen legend Marilyn Monroe and thought I'd tack it up here today.

Freshly married to the Yankee Clipper Joe DiMaggio, she cut short her honeymoon to entertain the troops fighting in Korea. She would go on to say several times in the years afterwards that the adulation she got from the servicemen in the audience was the highpoint of her career.

She looks so happy up there and it makes for a great picture.

A DAY THAT WILL LIVE IN INFAMY

Remembering those lost at Pearl Harbor on December 7, 1941

A HAND UP

Over the next few weeks, in the spirit of the holidays, I will be profiling a number of worthwhile charities that you will, hopefully, think about giving some time and/or money to.

The first is an organization called KIVA. I have copied and pasted their mission statement below.

"Kiva is the world's first person-to-person micro-lending website, empowering individuals to lend to unique entrepreneurs around the globe."

"The people you see on Kiva's site are real individuals. When you browse entrepreneurs' profiles on Kiva, choose someone to lend to, and then make a loan, you are helping a real person make great strides towards economic independence and improve life for themselves, their family, and their community. Throughout the course of the loan (usually 6-12 months), you can receive email journal updates and track repayments. Then, when you get your loan money back, you can relend to someone else."

HA! THE CURSE CONTINUES IT'S MAGIC

APPLE'S launch of the iPhone in China has taken off like a lead balloon.

Seems that the price, 6,999 yuan (US $1,024) for the 32GB iPhone 3GS, is out of reach of most shoppers. The lack of WiFi is also affecting it's success.

Five have been sold since they were launched two weeks ago.

It's so nice to see that my curse has reached international levels.

SLOW NEWS DAY

Is anyone surprised?

Yet another "sports personality" (yeah, I know, that phrase is a contradiction in terms), was caught cheating on his wife.

Thank god the sanctity of marriage is still protected.

WANTED DEAD OR ALIVE - ON SECOND THOUGHT, NEVER MIND

The war in Afghanistan is nicknamed "Operation Enduring Freedom" and I can't think of a more perfectly named war. Well, perfect for Osama Bin Laden, as he is still at large eight years after we were attacked.

Talk about enduring freedom!

A recently released Senate report says that the terrorist responsible for the 9/11 attacks on the United States was within reach of U.S. troops fighting in the Tora Bora Mountains but American military leaders made the decision to not pursue him with the massive force required to capture this murderer.

So here we are, eight years later and now it's being debated whether or not we should even be in Afghanistan anymore. What a waste of time, money AND lives. Let's not forget the 928 American troops who have died in this war (the total number of military lives lost is 1530 because this started out as a coalition effort. Also, these numbers are as of November 29, 2009).

I don't believe for a single minute that the Cheney/Bush regime ever had ANY interest in capturing this asshole and I doubt very much that he will be captured. Everyone seems to have moved on and feels there are more important issues to be dealt with.

MISTY WATER COLORED MEMORIES - VERY MISTY

Speaking at the George Moscone/Harvey Milk Memorial last night, former city supervisor Carol Ruth Silver talked of having a meeting at the home of famed San Francisco Attorney Melvin Belli, along with Harvey Milk, George Moscone and various members of the Board of Health regarding the fight against AIDS. This meeting was to have taken place sometime in 1978. Both Moscone and Milk were gunned down by former colleague Dan White in November of that same year.

Problem is, the meeting couldn't have happened.

AIDS was first reported on by the Centers for Disease Control in June of 1981. The disease wasn't even know as AIDS until September 1982 (it was originally called GRID, for Gay Related Immune Deficiency).

I don't want to take anything away from Ms. Silver. She certainly wasn't being malicious or anything. I just thought it was strange that she would tell a story that was an obvious attempt to place both Moscone and Milk even higher on the worship alter than they already are by placing them on the frontline of a battle that hadn't even started yet.

SEXIEST MOVIE EVER

Yes, it is.

I'D LIKE TO SEE THE KEEBLER ELVES TOP THIS

My officemate, Ryan, lives on a gluten-free diet, so today we had a gluten-free potluck (sort of). He brought in a homemade Pumpkin Pie and I brought in my almost world-famous Banana Nut Blueberry Bread (pictured above).

Both tasted pretty damn good.

PICTURE THIS

The old AT&T Building at 140 New Montgomery Street.

One of the nicer-looking buildings in downtown San Francisco, it was designed by local architect Timothy Pfleuger, who also designed the long-shuttered New Mission Theatre on Mission Street and the Castro Theatre on Castro Street.

Just something for your view pleasure today.

MAMA DON'T TAKE MY KODACHROME AWAY

I came across an article on MSNBC this afternoon about the demise of Kodak Kodachrome film development. Seems that there is only one guy in the ENTIRE world that still develops this film and even he is ending that service in 2010.

Dwayne's Photo is located in Kansas and is being swamped with people sending in old film negatives to be developed, receiving 1000 rolls a day from all over the world.

What a sad "development" this is.

(rimshot)

'TIS THE SEASON

I stopped off at the Westfield San Francisco Centre this morning and dropped of a new coat, that I bought and never wore, for the yearly One Warm Coat drive. It's a terrific organization that collects new and like-new jackets and coats for distribution to the homeless and poor.

It's a great idea that I'm happy to not only be apart of (at least this year), but I encourage everyone here to think about giving away that old coat that still looks good but isn't being worn anymore.

I'M SO DISAPPOINTED IN MYSELF BUT SO WHAT - IT WAS FUN!

This was my Thanksgiving ride, courtesy of Alamo. It was an upgrade from the car I had originally rented (the gas gauge was broken). I was a bit disappointed as this vehicle stands for everything I am against.

These cars are big, wasteful, gas-guzzlers and whenever I see someone in something like this (or bigger), I always scream: "it's because of you and your car that we got into that stupid war!!"

However, with all that said, it was so much fun, cruising along 101 at 75mph with "Sanctuary" by The Cult blasting from the speakers.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING

The staff of The Steaming Poop blog are taking a few days of to enjoy the holiday.

Have fun and don't eat too much.