ORAL EXAM

For many years (1988-1994), I used to get my haircut at Martin's Barbershop, which was located in the Warfield Building on Market Street. It was one of those old-school barber shops with Playboy magazines on the rack and because of its very sketchy location, LOTS of street theater to be seen through the window.

Martin had become very ill and eventually retired. Some time had passed before I happened to ask how Martin was doing. I was informed that he had passed away and when I expressed my condolences and asked from what, the reply was throat cancer. I replied with Oh wow, that's too bad. Bob, my barbers priceless and very candid response was:

Yeah, he ate too much pussy. Eat too much pussy and you get throat cancer, so don't eat pussy.

Duly noted.

So with that fond memory firmly planted in my brain, I wasn't at all surprised at what actor and throat cancer survivor Michael Douglas had to say on the subject:

. . . because without wanting to get too specific, this particular cancer is caused by HPV, which actually comes about from cunnilingus. I did worry if the stress caused by my son's incarceration didn't help trigger it. But yeah, it's a sexually transmitted disease that causes cancer.

Oh my.

Even though there is plenty of medical fact to back up Douglas' claim, his team quickly released this statement:

Michael Douglas did not say cunnilingus was the cause of his cancer. It was discussed that oral sex is a suspected cause of certain oral cancers as doctor's in the article point out but he did not say it was the specific cause of his personal cancer.

Awesome.