WINTER 1.0

After several weeks of sunny days and summer-like temperatures, the rain (and cold weather) finally arrived in San Francisco, overnight.

WHITE HUNTER, BLACK HEART

Daniel Richards, president of the California Fish and Game Commission has said there is "ZERO CHANCE" that, in spite of calls for him to do so, he will resign from his post, after this picture of him with a mountain lion he killed in Idaho surfaced.

"Do you really think a California commissioner is actually obligated to follow California laws across these United States? . . . Really? Did I try to change California's laws subversively? Did I encourage anyone to circumvent our rules and regulations? . . . While I respect our Fish and Game rules and regulations, my 100 percent legal activity outside California, or anyone else's for that matter, is none of your business."

Well, he's probably right, but then he went on to say:

"And so we're perfectly clear, this hunt was not a high-fence hunt, we didn't use (four) wheel drive trucks, snow machines or ATVs to chase the cat, I did not use a high-powered rifle with a scope at 300 yards and we did dine on mountain lion for dinner, all contrary to some erroneous reports" 

Dined on mountain lion for dinner? Yeah, that didn't happen. Seriously, who eats mountain lion? Also, it is being reported that they used dogs on this hunt, and that this mountain lion was laying in a tree when Richards shot it.

This guy is a total dick.

SUPERMODEL

I'm not normally a fan of the double-breasted sport coat, but I liked the one I recently modeled very much. In fact, I really liked everything I wore for this photo shoot.

OMG

“I don’t believe in an America where the separation of church and state is absolute. The idea that the church can have no influence or no involvement in the operation of the state is absolutely antithetical to the objectives and vision of our country . . . This is the First Amendment. The First Amendment says the free exercise of religion. That means bringing everybody, people of faith and no faith, into the public square. Kennedy for the first time articulated the vision saying, no, ‘faith is not allowed in the public square. I will keep it separate.’ Go on and read the speech ‘I will have nothing to do with faith. I won’t consult with people of faith.’ It was an absolutist doctrine that was foreign at the time of 1960"

Oh Rick, if you're going to use the First Amendment as a point of reference, then you should probably know what it says and what it means, so just in case you've forgotten:

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances.

The fact that you don't know this, even after receiving your snobby college education, really frightens me.

IN THE CLOSET

This is one outfit I would like to see in my shopping bag this weekend.

FOOT IN MOUTH DISEASE

"President Obama has said he wants everybody in America to go to college. What a snob . . . There are good, decent men and women who go out and work hard every day, and put their skills to test, who aren't taught by some liberal college professor (who) tries to indoctrinate them. I understand why he wants you to go to college. He wants to remake you in his image. I want to create jobs so people can remake their children into their image, not his."

So says republican presidential candidate Rick Sanitorium, holder of a law degree and an MBA.

Oh Rick, I doubt there are many parents who would discourage their kids from going to college. After all, two of  yours are currently attending college.

What a dick.

GIRL CRUSH

Emma Stone, I have once again found myself absolutely beguiled by your charms.

Brilliant.

FOR YOUR CONSIDERATION

Brett McKenzie (Flight of the Conchords) winning for writing
the song Man or Muppet, for The Muppets - Awesome.

I don't normally care about  the red carpet BS - I mean,
how many times do we have to hear that nauseating phrase
"a return to Old Hollywood Glamour?"
However, Stacy Kiebler looked so damn good
in this number by Marchesa.

Although the race in their respective categories was close, I think
it was a bit of a surprise that both Meryl Streep (The Iron Lady), and
Jean Dujardin (The Artist) won. Like most, I assumed that Viola Davis
would win for The Help. However, as I watched The Iron Lady on dvd 
this weekend (SAG screener courtesy of Heidi - thanks Heidi), it was
obvious to me that Meryl was going to take an Oscar home.

Angelina, a little advice - GO EAT SOMETHING, please!

ELEPHANT IN THE ROOM

"The President’s liberal friends in Hollywood (are) targeting a younger demographic using animated movies to sell their agenda to children”

-- Conservative windbag Lou Dobbs, on Arrietty and The Lorax, two films based on classic children's books.

Yeah, and I'm so sure that the children's book Calista Gingrich has recently written, Sweet Land of Liberty, featuring the character Ellis the Elephant, is just bursting with non-partisan story telling.

FLY ME TO THE MOON

Fly me to the moon

Let me play among the stars

Let me see what spring is like

On Jupiter and Mars

In other words, hold my hand

In other words, darling, kiss me

-- Bart Howard

HAVING CHURCH

IN THE CLOSET

Yeah, I think the entire ensemble works for me.

MISSING IN ACTION

Seriously, it's been WAY TOO LONG since I last enjoyed this uppity and salty treat.

IT'S GONNA HAPPEN, WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT

With a 25-22 vote in favor, Maryland becomes the 8th state to allow same-sex marriage. Governor Martin O'Malley has said he will sign the bill when it arrives on his desk.

KRAMER VS KRAMER

So this guy in Cincinnati posts a rant on his Facebook page about his divorce and child visitation issues. His ex-wife, who was blocked from viewing his page, found out from a mutual friend what was said, and felt the post violated a court protection order preventing him from doing anything that would cause her "to suffer physical and/or mental abuse, harassment, annoyance, or bodily injury." The ex-wife filed a complaint that his posting violated that court-order, and to MY shock and dismay, the judge agreed.

Domestic Relations Magistrate Paul Meyers found Mark Byron in contempt and ordered him jailed for 60 days beginning March 19 — or to post for 30 days on his Facebook page an apology to his wife, written by Meyers, if he wanted to avoid jail. He also had to pay her $1,156 in back child support and her lawyers' fees. The judge also ordered that Byron add his wife as a friend or let HER choose a mutual friend to monitor his posts.

What. The. Fuck?

Call me crazy (and a few have), but this seems to be a First Amendment issue. I mean, doesn't this guy have a right to say what he wants on HIS PAGE? If Byron is unhappy about his child custody arrangement, he certainly has the right to express that dissatisfaction, don't you think?

Seriously, his ex-wife really needs to get a life.

SUMMER 2.0

Here I am enjoying an urban hike to the tippy tippy top of Corona Heights Park yesterday afternoon, as the temperature soared to 72 degrees.

Welcome back, Summer.

GAMES PEOPLE PLAY

Oh boy, did I LOVE me some Space Invaders back in the day.

JIM NORTON, JIM NORTON, JIM NORTON

So the National Enquirer has seen it fit to publish cover photos of Whitney Houston, as she lay in her coffin. Pretty disturbing, if you ask me, and comedian Jim Norton posted a Facebook status yesterday that really couldn't have been better stated:

"I would like the same people who perpetually whine and cry about airport security and how it ‘violates privacy’ to refrain from buying the magazine . . . Or from even looking at the photo while standing in line in the supermarket. Ahh, that’s right; it’s only a privacy violation when it’s YOUR privacy being infringed upon."

Very well said, Jim.

SUMMER 2.0

Here I am frolicking at Ocean Beach yesterday, as the temperature soared to 71 degrees.

Welcome back, Summer.

COOKIE JAR

" . . . abundant evidence proves that the agenda of Planned Parenthood includes sexualizing young girls through the Girl Scouts, which is quickly becoming a tactical arm of Planned Parenthood. Planned Parenthood instructional series and pamphlets are part of the core curriculum at GSA training seminars. Denver Auxiliary Bishop James D. Conley of Denver last year warned parents that 'membership in the Girl Scouts could carry the danger of making their daughters more receptive to the pro-abortion agenda'"

-- Indiana State Representative Bob Morris (R)

Oh boy, that is rich.

As a response to this amusingly ridiculous rant, Indiana Republican House Speaker Brian Bosma purchased 278 boxes of Girl Scout Cookies, and handed them out on the senate floor.

ADULT TOY STORY

Um . . .

ALL TIED UP

I absolutely love 'em, but I just couldn't get the one I wanted to wear to my interview yesterday to tie correctly.

DIRTY BLONDE

I'm not sure why, but I love this picture.

MORE THAN A MOUTHFUL

I was very amused to not only see the venerable eating establishment Hooters located in a local mall, but seeing this particular location next door to the entrance leading into Sears' young girls clothing department.

Oh, I wonder what that ridiculous so-called activist group 27 Bored Housewives - er, I mean OneMillionMoms would have to say about this, and the message it sends?

GO SPEED RACER GO

Oh, Audi A3, you fulfill my fuel-injected wet dreams, every time I rent you from ZipCar, as I did earlier this afternoon.

You are always so much fun to drive.

MONEYBALLS

Or maybe I should say Mannyballs.

The Oakland A's announced earlier today that they've signed former Boston Red Sox and Los Angeles Dodger Manny Ramirez to a 1-year, $500,000 contract, just $20,000 above league minimum.

The slugger will bring two World Series rings (2004 and 2007) to the aging Oakland Coliseum. He will also bring lots of baggage, including failed drug tests, accusations that he has quit on teams, charges of domestic violence, and an incident in Boston in which he pushed over the team's 64-year-old traveling secretary.

Wow, what a douche bag.

Ramirez will also have to sit out the first 50 games, as part of his punishment for testing positive for performance enhancing drugs.

Okay, way to go, A's.

SUNDAY FUNNIES

HAVING CHURCH

Can I get an amen?

WE GOT THE BEAT

It's hard to believe this was the number two song, 30 YEARS AGO!

Ouch.

Anyway, here's a true classic from the landmark album Beauty and the Beat, by the Go-Go's.

COLLECTION PLATE

BBC is reporting that the Italian government will be ending the tax-free status the Vatican has been enjoying since 2005. The tax will be levied on non-religious properties, which is said to include residential properties and shopping centers.

Shopping Centers??

Anyway, it's expected that the tax bill could reach as much as $720 million Euros, which is nearly $950 million in American dollars.

Oh man, it would be so cool if they could manage to do something like this here. Can you imagine the benefits of taxing the churches here in America? A deficit that would be non-existent, schools that were fully-funded, the possibly of a budget surplus.

Let's pray on it, shall we?

PICTURE THIS

Here's a shot I took yesterday at 17th and Market Streets.

I call it "Lines."

SOLE DESIRE

I really like these sneakers, and would sincerely appreciate them as a gift, in size 9, please.

Thank you in advance for your generosity.

JAM ON IT

A true old-school classic, Newcleus' Jam On It has some serious dope-ass breaks. Get out your cardboard dance floor kids, 'cause you can't break dance with your X-Box.

SURE SHOT

Here's another classic, this time from 1994's Ill Communication, this is the Beastie Boys Sure Shot.

An awesome song from an awesome album, enjoy.

FOSTER'S FREEZE

It cures headaches, can help during a heart attack and now, according to a major contributor to presidential candidate Rick Santorum's Super PAC, aspirin can be used as a contraceptive.

During an exchange with MSNBC host Andrea Mitchell, billionaire investor Foster Friess had this to say about the use of aspirin to prevent pregnancy:

Mitchell: Do you have any concerns about some of his comments on social issues, contraception, about women in combat, and whether that would hurt his general election campaign would he be the nominee?

Friess: I get such a chuckle when these things come out. Here we have millions of our fellow Americans unemployed, we have jihadist camps being set up in Latin America, which Rick has been warning about, and people seem to be so preoccupied with sex. I think it says something about our culture. We maybe need a massive therapy session so we can concentrate on what the real issues are. And this contraceptive thing, my gosh, it’s such inexpensive. Back in my day, they used Bayer aspirin for contraceptives. The gals put it between their knees and it wasn’t that costly.

Mitchell's response is absolutely priceless:

Excuse me, I’m just trying to catch my breath from that, Mr. Friess, frankly.

Frankly, Ms. Mitchell, I think we all are.

SUMMER 2.0

Here I am enjoying a dive into the local swimmin' hole yesterday, as the temperature soared to 65 degrees.

Welcome back, Summer.

ATTACK OF THE KILLER TOMATOES

I posted following as my Facebook status this past weekend. I also posted it to the Facebook page of Bi-Rite Market, as well. To my shock and dismay, they were completely unresponsive (although they wasted no time in deleting my post from their pagge), so I went ahead and added them to my growing BOYCOTT list.

Here's how it all went down:

Just FYI - I was in your store earlier today and purchased a few items, including a sandwich from your deli. Out of habit, I asked for extra tomato on that sandwich. The counter person then asked if I was sure I wanted extra tomato, and I thought she was just making a joke or something. I said yes, and then she went into this weird speech about she would do it, but that tomatoes weren't in season, that it was detrimental to my health and was something I should think about.

First of all, I don't need to be schooled on my health. I am an adult and know what healthy eating is all about. If there is such a concern about what is seasonal or not, then why is there tomato in the deli department in the first place? 

Secondly, there are plenty of items for sale in your store that would be considered "detrimental to my health," i.e. Bulliet Bourbon, cows milk, non gluten-free items, etc, and I don't think the TWO small slices of tomato she grudgingly placed in my sandwich are going to kill me. Neither is the avocado, which was not only in the sandwich, but is also not in season.

I went ahead and bought the sandwich, along with a few other items, but I was so bothered by this experience that I'm not likely to return to your store, and will probably walk a few more blocks east to Rainbow Market, where I know the person behind the counter isn't going to point their finger at me because of what I'm buying.

Buh Bi-Rite.

EAT SHIT AND DIE

Here's a milkshake that I highly doubt will bring all the boys to the yard.

Coming in at 773 calories, with 40 grams of fat, 75 grams of sugar, and as if all that wasn't enough, 319mg of sodium, the venerable fast-food joint Jack in the Box calls this 16 ounce cup of vomit the Bacon Milkshake (a bacon-flavored milkshake).

They should have just called it the Drink Shit and Die Milkshake.

So gross.

GROUND HOG DAY

One of my fondest New York memories is of the lunchtime mini-concert legendary singer Tony Bennett gave on top of the Radio City Music Hall marquee in 1996, celebrating the release of his Here's To The Ladies cd.

NYPD had anticipated a crowd large enough that they closed one lane of traffic on 6th Avenue. However, so many people came to cheer their native son (Bennett grew up in Queens), that the entire street was eventually closed to accommodate the growing lunchtime crowd.

It was pretty awesome and when the concert was done, I ran right over to Musicland (because this was back in the day when you still bought music in stores) and purchased the CD on my way back to the office.

Yesterday, San Francisco mayor Ed Lee declared it Tony Bennett Day, in honor of the 50th anniversary since he first performed the classic I Left My Heart In San Francisco (at the Fairmont Hotel's Venetian Room). Bennett drew a HUGE crowd to city hall, and even though he didn't perform the song he's best known for, the love that was being shown to this adopted native son was just as large as it was on that similarly sunny day back in 1996.

STUPID STUFF STUPID WHITE PEOPLE LIKE

The annual Valentine's Day Pillow Fight in Justin Hermnan Plaza, which takes place at 6pm tonight.

(sigh)

LOVE STINKS

Happy Valentines Day from the staff of The Steaming Poop blog.

VALENTINE CARD

Boy, it sure sucks to be Steven today, doesn't it?

SUPER PAC MAN

For those who are interested, the New York Times recently published the list of donors to the various political "SUPER PAC's."

Political candidates are allowed to raise a maximum of $2,500 per person for each election. However, super PACs (political action committees) are (supposedly) independent from candidates and are allowed to raise unlimited amounts of cash from individuals, corporations and labor unions, and spend unlimited amounts to support or oppose a candidate.

(sigh) 

Thank you, Supreme Court.

FOODIE CALL

I'm not sure why, but I've had meat loaf on my mind a lot, lately.

I found myself at the Blackhawk Grille (in Danville, for my cousin Pete's birthday) this past Saturday afternoon, and when I saw they had a Grilled Meat Loaf Sandwich on the menu, I ordered it.

As you can see, it was pretty good.

HOT WHEELS

This is just a sampling of the vintage cars on display at the Blackhawk Museum, in Danville. It's a very impressive collection, if you ask me, and worth a visit if you're ever in that area.

TRIBUTE

I wonder how many of the people who have spent the last 24 hours memorializing Whitney Houston, who passed away yesterday at age 48, really liked her as much as they seem to, now that she's gone.

At any rate, here are two favorites that I've enjoyed over the years, especially I Have Nothing, a song that I've always had a soft spot for.

MENSWEAR

I'm not sure I could pull this off, but I'm loving everything about this look.

WINTER 1.0

Here I am at Ocean Beach yesterday, as the (light) rain rolled in.

Winter arrives in San Francisco.

FUNNY SHIT MY BARBER DAN SAYS

As the weather was changing from cold and drizzly to sunny during my haircut yesterday, my barber Dan had this to say:

"Every time I wear long underwear, the fucking weather always breaks"

LATE NIGHT DOUBLE FEATURE PICTURE SHOW

These are two movies that I'm sure I'd enjoy. Who want's to go with, I'll buy the popcorn.