I WANT MY MTV

Original VJ's (left to right) Alan Hunter, the late J.J. Jackson,
Martha Quinn (my favourite), Nina Blackwood, and Mark Goodman

August 1, 1981 is a day that will live in pop culture infamy.

It was the first day MTV (Music Television) went on the air. The cable channel didn't catch on right away, but when it did, it was like a sonic boom.

There is no denying the impact MTV has had on our culture, both good and bad, so it seems a bit strange (and sad) that the celebrations have been relegated to its sister station, VH-1 Classics.

THIS HOUSE IS EXQUISITE, I'D LIKE TO MAKE AN OFFER

Seriously, I like a challenge.

ROSEMARYS BABY

It had been a few years since I had last seen the film Rosemary's Baby (Paramount, 1968), so I was happy to see it in my mailbox (thank you, Netflix) when I got home on Friday. It's arrival couldn't have been more timely, as it had been a bit of a disappointing day.

Nothing like a little devil worshipping to pick your spirits up, huh?

Anyway, I would have to say it was incredibly genius of director Roman Polanski to have cast some of the great old Hollywood character actors like Ruth Gordon (who won the Oscar that year for Best Supporting Actress), Elisha Cook, Jr., Ralph Bellamy, Maurice Evans, and Patsy Kelly.

Patsy Kelly?!?!?

Many of these actors were primarily known for the work in comedy, so it sort of throws you when you see them in something so dramatically different and disturbing.

So brilliant.

FREAKY FRIDAY

EAT SHIT AND DIE

The New York State Fair is proud to announce the latest weapon in the country's on-going battle against obesity.

It is a seemingly traditional-looking hamburger served up with lettuce, tomato, pickle, onion and two slices of cheese with a twist: a glazed donut has replaced the traditional bun. Weighing in at a whopping 1500 calories, they call it the Donut Burger.

I call it the Eat Shit and Die Burger.

So gross.

RESURRECTION

As some of you may remember, I lovingly memorialized my 56 year old toaster, which stopped working unexpectedly this past June. I half-heartedly searched for a replacement, but really, nothing compared to my beloved 1955 Toastmaster.

While making breakfast a few days ago, a whisper was heard in my kitchen "if you plug in, it will work."

I did, and to my delight, it did!

Welcome back, Toastmaster, you were missed.

HAPPY (BELATED) ANNIVERSARY

Two years (and one day) ago, the "publish post" button at the office of The Steaming Poop blog was pressed for the first time.

Thanks for reading.

HOUSE PARTY

Here are some pictures from the celebration of our second anniversary:

there was some drinking . . .

. . . and a little dancing

 here I am joking with the girls from the

typing pool . . .

. . .  and later, on the receiving end of a surprise strip tease

in the office supply room

rock legend (and my former NY neighbor) Deborah Harry

stopped by to say hello

things did get a little crazy when our receptionist,

Gertie, drank a bit too much and showed us

how she rolls - no one was hurt, but there is a

hole in the wall that needs to be patched

I believe this was taken when I finally passed out

after an evening of complete debauchery, although that's not

my bed . . . or the underwear I was wearing when I got dressed

earlier that day.

TOY STORY 4

Venerable toy maker Mattel announced recently a line of adult-themed toys. The first from the line to be released is the Backdoor Barbie.

Actually, that's not true at all. I was just amused when I came across this photo.

SUBTITLES

Oh, James Franco, I'm going to start calling you "Killer," because you slay me.

FOOT IN MOUTH DISEASE

On his radio show earlier this week, asshole radio personality Glenn Beck was discussing last week's attacks in Norway, where at least 76 people were killed. The fired Fox News commentator was talking about the Utoya Island camp run by the ruling Labor Party for youngsters interested in politics, and he had this to say:

"sounds a little like the Hitler Youth or whatever . . . Who does a camp for kids that's all about politics? Disturbing."

Wow.

Actually, Mr. Beck, there are several youth clubs that are devoted to government right here in the U.S.A.

While in high school, I was (briefly) in a club called Close-up, a group that studied and debated government. Membership in this club included a trip to Washington D.C., where club memebers toured the Capital and met with local congressional and senatorial representatives. At no time did anyone wear a swastika or any other kind of "Hitler" regalia.

Torbjorn Eriksen, a former press secretary to Norway prime minister Jens Stoltenberg had this to say in response to Beck's hateful and hurtful comments:

"Young political activists have gathered at Utoya for over 60 years to learn about and be part of democracy, the very opposite of what the Hitler Youth was about . . . Glenn Beck's comments are ignorant, incorrect and extremely hurtful."

Glenn Beck, you really do redefine the word asshole.

NICE PACKAGE

EXCESS BAGGAGE

Although he hasn't announced his candidacy for the GOP nomination just yet, Rick Perry, current governor of Texas, seems to be packing the kind of excess baggage that is sets off all sorts of alarms in the Steaming Poop newsroom.

First of all, I'm sure why anyone would want to run for the office of the President of the United States when they've spoken of seceding from the Union. Perry is on record as saying:

"We are very proud of our Texas history; people discuss and debate the issues of can we break ourselves into five states, can we secede, a lot of interesting things that I'm sure Oklahoma and Pennsylvania would love to be able to say about their states, but the fact is, they can't because they're not Texas."

Sounds like he's on board, if you ask me. I have no problem letting Texas go, so maybe he should just run for president of that country, instead.

Perry also cut $4 billion dollars from their education budget. This makes sense, considering Texas is dead last in percentage adults over the age of 25 without a high school diploma and pregnant women who receive prenatal care. The Lone Star State has some good news, however, as it is Number one in prision executions, pollution, and uninsured children.

On August 6, the governor is hosting an event called The Response, a seven-hour, Christians-only (Christians-only?) prayer event. His office calls the event as "a Day of Prayer and Fasting for our nation to seek God's guidance and wisdom in addressing the challenges that face our communities, states and nation."

SIGH

Last but not least, Perry was the Lieutenant Governor under George W. Bush.

I'm not sure how serious his campaign can or will be, considering candidates as hardcore conservative as he seems to be, rarely make it to, or through, the convention process. Still, anything can happen, right? After all, Michele "Skidmark" Bachmann is still running a very close second place behind the more credible GOP candidate, Mitt Romney.

HEAVY ROTATION

I know this song has been out for several months now, but I can't get enough of the group Foster The People or their song (a favourite of mine), Pumped Up Kicks.

HOMO YOU DON'T

It's been roughly 18 hours since gay marriage came to New York state, and the sky did not burst into flame, the earth did not open up, the locusts never came, and everyone went about their business.

Folks, it's gonna happen, whether you like it or not, so get used to it.

MOTORCYCLE MAMA

I love, love, LOVE this photo.

ZOOM ZOOM

I have no idea what the make and model of car this is, but I would look so good behind the wheel.

BODY DOUBLE

It's been a well-kept secret so far but just so you know, I was Chris Evans' body double in the current box office smash Captain America.

All I ask is that you keep it just between us, because the movie is a huge hit right now and I don't want to distract from its success.

FOODIE CALL

I don't know about you, but I'm feeling like I need to do a burger run today.

Who's in?

TRIBUTE

WALKMAN CLASSICS

I've never been to a Janet Jackson concert, but if the tour she did in support of her landmark 1986 album Control was anything like this video, then I sort of feel like I really missed out on something pretty cool.

MINNESOTA TWINS

I find it amusing and confusing that Minnesota voters elected both Michele "Skidmark" Bachmann (R) AND Al Franken (D), two politicians who couldn't be more further apart on issues.

Here's a clip from the house hearings on the repeal of the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA). Al kind of slams the head of Focus on the Family, who was caught trying to manipulate the results of a Department of Human and Health Services study on the effects of children who grow up in same sex marriages.

Give 'em hell, Al.

PICTURE THIS

Here are a few shots taken during another recent visit to Point Reyes, my favourite place to hike.

iFAKE

If it looks a duck and quacks like a duck, it's a duck, right?

Not in this case.

It seems there is a fake Apple store located in Kunming, the capital of Yunnan Province in China. The dead giveaway should have been caught in picture one, as Apple is not in the habit of actually having the words APPLE on the outside of their stores, just their logo.

The store claims they're just an unauthorized dealer and are not selling knock-off's. It would be pretty funny if they were, in fact, selling knock-offs with names such as the iPAWD or the iFAUXN.

Very amusing.

JEEPIN'

Murray Duvall: Where you been all weekend? What's up? You been jeepin' around behind my back?
Dionne Davenport: Jeepin'?
Cher Horowitz: Jeepin'.
Murray Duvall: Jeepin', jeepin'.
Dionne Davenport: No, but speaking of vehicular sex, perhaps you can explain to me how this cheap K-mart hair extension got into the back seat of your car.

I still love Clueless.

COOKIE AND IRVING'S DANCE PARTY

Click the photo to see how it all went down last night.

TRIBUTE

I was apart of a group message received from a Facebook friend yesterday that someone she thought we might know had recently passed away.

James (although I knew him as 'Jimmy') Mathiesen is the Marin County Deputy Sheriff who was gunned down a few nights ago in rural Petaluma. I was pretty stunned when I got the message, so I went to a local news site to find out what the story was. When I read about the horrifying turn of events that lead to his death, I don't know what was more shocking; that it took place just up the road from where I grew up, that it took place at the home of a childhood friend (who's family still lives there), or the tragic but heroic way that he died.

I had forgotten (thanks for the reminder, Gwen), but Jimmy drove a white Cadillac that had cow horns on the front hood and every day when I rode my bike home from school, he would always wave hello as he passed by in the opposite direction.

It had been MANY years since I had last seen him, but I always remembered Jimmy as a very friendly and happy guy who seemed to always walk around with a permanent smile. It was nice to read that he hadn't changed one bit over the years.

THE GOOD GIRL

Oh Zooey, you're channeling me.

OSCAR CLASSIC

How scary could this be? It's produced by Aaron Spelling and Leonard Goldberg, and I'm sure probably (and unintentionally) funnier than hell.

I wanna see it.

HANOI JANE

While QVC won't confirm the reason, it's been said the cancellation of acting legend Jane Fonda's appearance on the home shopping channel was due to complaints received about her views on the Vietnam War.

The Vietnam War?

Isn't that the war that ended in 1974?

I'm looking at my calendar right now and it says July 2011. Seriously, is that the reason? That is such bullshit.

Jane pissed off a lot of people for her anti-war activism and for being photographed in North Vietnam, sitting on an anti-aircraft battery. The photograph probably wasn't one of her more shining moments, but she has acknowledged that, and has apologized over and over again. Jane has also since then won two Oscars, returned to Broadway with great success, sold tens of millions of exercise videos and books, and has even become a born-again Christian. It seems, for the most part, that most people don't care anymore, so I'm not sure why QVC caved into a small, ridiculous group of folks who can't seem to let go of the past.

For the people out there who are STILL having an issue with her because of this, I have one thing to say:

GET A LIFE!  Seriously. It is time to move on.

AMBER WAVES

Just a couple of shots from a recent hike along the Bear Valley trail in the Point Reyes National Seashore.

FOODIE CALL

roast beef

If you ever find yourself in Lagunitas (or on your way to Pt. Reyes, as I did recently), you MUST stop in at the Lagunitas Grocery and Deli, 7290 Sir Francis Drake Boulevard.

They make a pretty mean (and filling) sandwich.

ALICE DOESN'T LIVE HERE ANYMORE

Directed by Martin Scorcese, Alice Doesn't Live Here, Anymore is on my list of favourite movies. It was also the inspiration for the long-running television show Alice. If you've ever seen the show, you might scratch your head and ask yourself "how did they go from Scorcese to 'Kiss my grits,'" but I digress.

Recently widowed and broke, Alice (portrayed by Ellen Burstyn, who won the Best Actress Oscar for this performance) hits the road with her son to pursue her long-deferred dream of becoming a singer. She gets stuck in Tuscon, becoming a waitress and falling in love, instead.

Why do I love this movie so much? It is probably the most New York Film not filmed in New York. But then, look who the director is. Anyway, while looking for a job as a singer in a series of local bars, this exchange takes place between Alice and a bar owner:

Bar owner: So you're a singer?
Alice: Yes.
Bar owner: Well, turn around.
Alice: Excuse me, why?
Bar owner: 'Cause I want to get a look at you.
Alice: Well, look at my face, I don't sing with my ass!

Oh man, I love this movie.

BOOM CHICKA BOW WOW

I'm not sure what's going on here, but this is Bruce Springsteen, circa mid 70's, letting everyone know he's got a little garbarge going on down below.