THE INTERVIEW

So, a lot has been written about the Seth Rogen-James Franco comedy, The Interview, it's aborted release and Sony Entertainment's decision to go ahead and release the film both theatrically and online. The phrase "Free Speech" has been attached to this amusing controversy. It's one that I don't think applies and here's why.

First, you have to pay to watch this movie, there's nothing free about it. It's not like Sony had planned to show this in every town square across America for free, in hopes of sparking a debate about global politics and tyrannical dictators. 

Second, the real issue here, at least for me, was about caving in to a so-called terrorist group that threatened to blow up theaters showing what I'm sure will become a classic comedy for the ages. For years, we've been beating our chests and yelling "These colors don't run" and "We don't cut and run" and the classic, "If we give in, the terrorists win."

And that's exactly what happened.

In this case, the terrorists, at least temporarily, did win. The way Sony chose to handle this situation perfectly highlighted just how much of a pussy nation we've really become. Eventually, Sony changed it's mind (big surprise), with company CEO Michael Lynton going so far as saying "While we hope this is only the first step of the film's release, we are proud to make it available to the public and to have stood up to those who attempted to suppress free speech."

Hmm, . . . proud to make it available and to have stood up to those who attempted to suppress free speech. Yeah, nice try, Lynton, but your company didn't stand up at all. In fact, it kinda bent over like a little prison bitch at the first sign of trouble.

HOLIDAY

As I was recently watching Madonna: Truth or Dare, it suddenly hit me that I was watching a film documenting a tour that took place 25 years ago.

Okay, that hurt just a little bit.

Actually, it hurt quite a bit because I saw this movie in its initial release, but who cares. It's still fun to watch and one that I highly recommend.

This is the Madonna at the peak of her career, and it's how I choose to remember her.

BEATIFICATION

Ruth. Gerhig. DiMaggio. Mantle. Jackson. Munson. Mattingly. Jeter.

2014 was Derek Jeter's final season with the New York Yankees and the team, at least for me, will never be quite the same again.

TRIBUTE

There was no middle ground when it came to Joan Rivers. You either liked her or you didn't and that was it.

I thought she was awesome!

Here she is on The Ed Sullivan Show in 1967. The concept of female comics was still fairly new back then and some felt it wasn't a woman's place to be on stage telling jokes. You can tell that by the audience reaction to some of her jokes, but she still got through to them.

When I read earlier this year that after 70 years, Broadway-legend Elaine Stritch had left New York City and returned to her hometown of Detroit, MI (due to failing health), it was at that moment I (quite easily) closed the door to the long-held dream of moving back to the city I call My Oz.

There's just no way I can live in a city that doesn't count Stritchie (Noel Coward's nickname for her) as one of its inhabitants.

HEY MR. DJ PUT A RECORD ON

Soul-drenched vocals combined with a little bit of torch, a little bit of R & B and topped off with a heavy dose of Amy Winehouse-inspiration, Liam Bailey's Autumn Leave, is the best song of 2014. In fact, Definitely NOW, the album it appears on, is 2014's finest album.

DROP THE SOAP

Gone Girl is my pick for this year's best film. Not only did this thriller have me on the edge of my seat, but this little moment towards the end of the movie was a nice little perk.

Ben Affleck looks pretty good in the buff, huh?

Oh, and Jennifer Garner, if you're reading this, THANK YOU!  If we ever meet up, drinks are on me.

CHANGE OF ADDRESS

Oh, sweetheart, if you're referring to The White House, the correct address is 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue.

Proof again that beauty fades, stupid lasts forever.

BRIDGEWORK

Western portion of the Oakland-San Francisco
Bay Bridge

So CalTrans announced yesterday that more water has been found in the anchor tower-area of the newly-built eastern span of the Oakland-San Francisco Bay Bridge, increasing the possibility of corrosion. Officials say the water has been drained but also added there is no room to maneuver replacement rods into place, should the exposed rods show signs of corrosion.

Opening 10 years late and coming in $5 billion dollars over-budget, it really looks like we didn't get a whole lot of bang for our buck, huh?

I just hope I'm not on that bridge when it falls into the bay.

SAINT JETER

It was a dramatic ending worthy of a New York Yankee.

Bottom of the ninth inning with the score tied, team captain Derek Jeter comes up to bat for the final time at Yankee Stadium (there are three more road games to be played). The ball is pitched, Jeter swings and he delivers a walk-off hit that brings in the winning win, giving The Bronx Bombers the win over the Baltimore Orioles, 5-6.

Ruth. Gehrig, DiMaggio. Mantle. Jackson. Munson. Mattingly. Jeter.

Someone call The Vatican, STAT! I've got my nomination for the next saint.

BEND IT LIKE BECKHAM

I'm beginning to believe when Steve Jobs died, he took the company with him.

So over the last few days, it's been discovered that not only are the new iPhone 6 and 6 Plus easily bendable, much to the chagrin of users, but that the iOS 8 update was a big fat failure. In a rare move, Apple pulled said update after folks complained they weren't able make calls. The update also disabled the new fingerprint-sensor security feature, preventing users from even accessing their own phones. All this on top of a hoax ad that falsely informed users they could charge their phones by placing them into a microwave oven (see BRAIN WAVES post below)

The BlackBerry is looking pretty good today, huh kids?

Keep drinking the Kool-Aid, keep drinking the Kool-Aid.

FOLLOW

As I posted a few days ago, I've been having a hard time picking out a favorite song on the 2012 debut release Oshin, from Brooklyn-based Diiv, because the whole album is so damn good.

However, if I was forced to call one out, Follow would be pretty high on the list.

BRAIN WAVES

Stories like this have me dusting off an old phrase I used to say back in the day:

No brain, no pain.

It seems some iPhone users have been duped into believing a fake ad claiming you can charge your iPhone by placing it into a microwave oven, by way of an app that automatically uploads to your phone during a iOS8 update.

Oh man, I wish I could take credit for this hoax.

HIT PARADE

It may have dropped in 2012, but Oshin, from the Brooklyn-based group DIIV is new to me, so here goes.

 

I am so in love with this release right now and am having a hard time picking out a favorite because they're all so damn good!

 

I'll get back to you shortly.

TRIBUTE

Her monologue here is slightly risque and maybe even a bit obnoxious, yet she's absolutely on the mark and wickedly brilliant. She is, how we say in the business "killing it!

This is Joan Rivers at her very best!

You did good, Joan. Very good, indeed.

BOOKWORM

"One time, my hitchhiking date was Patricia Hearst. As we walked toward Route 6 from Provincetown, we quickly go a ride, but I don't think the driver recognized me until we got in, me in the front, her in the back. He kept doing double takes looking over at me and finally said, "Are you John Waters?" and I said, yes and at the same time he looked in the rearview mirror, I said "And that's Patty Hearst." He looked totally shocked but I could tell he realized it was her. "He made me do it," Patty deadpanned, and I was so proud of her improvisational skills. We were now a hitchhiking comedy duo."

"Later, her husband, Bernie, whom I love but realize is the head of security for Hearst Corporation, was a little perturbed when she told him of our day's adventure. "Oh, come on, John," he said with impatience, "hasn't she had enough trouble?!"

I guess he was right.

-- John Water, Carsick: John Waters Hitchhikes Across America

I'm only on page 9 and I've laughed out loud several times already. I wouldn't expect any less from one of my favorite people.

CITY LIGHTS

I'll try to be as brief as possible.

The Tramp (Charlie Chaplin) meets a homeless blind woman selling flowers on the street and is immediately taken by her beauty. When he realizes that she cannot see, he decides to do whatever he can to raise enough money (which he does) for the surgery she needs to restore her sight (which she gets).

High-jinx ensue.

Although this clip is four minutes long, I guarantee the payoff at the end is more than worth it. The final scene is, without a doubt, the finest and most powerful moment ever captured on film and I am secure enough in my masculinity to admit that I'm a blubbering mess the minute she touches his hand and realizes who this hobo really is.

Yes, City Lights is a silent film but that's okay, because sometimes words just get in the way.

THE RED BALLOON

It was my first art film.

First seen in elementary school (probably first grade), there aren't many films that move me more than this Oscar-winning classic. It took the award for Best Screenplay (1956), which is kinda funny since there is virtually no dialog.

But that's okay, sometimes words just get in the way.

J'adore ce film tellement!

LIAM BAILEY

Lush, soul-drenched vocals combined with an old-school R&B vibe and a little bit of longing torch and country twang, Liam Bailey's debut album, Definitely Now, is definitely one for the ages. 

Seriously, this could be the finest album of 2014. 

Take a minute and listen to my current personal favorite, Autumn Leaves, and I'm sure you'll quickly understand why I listened to this song five times in a row.

Yeah, it's that good.

OPENING ACT

Being the opening act for a headliner is more often than not a thankless job. I've often sat through shows where the entire performance was booed by the audience. Maybe sometime I'll tell you the story two-time Tony Award-winning actor Nathan Lane once shared with me about his experience as the opening act for country singer Eddie Rabbit at the Phoenix Theater in Petaluma back in 1983.

Let's just say that when he finished sharing his sad tale, I immediately apologized on behalf of an audience filled some assholes that I'm sure I actually knew. I know what you're thinking because I thought the same thing: Eddie Rabbit's opening act was Nathan Lane?

Talk about a totally random pairing, huh?

Anyway, I'm posting about it today because I caught the first of Sharon Jones and the Dap Kings three sold-out shows at The Fillmore Auditorium last Thursday evening and let's just say Valerie Jones' experience as an opening act couldn't have been more different than Mr. Lane's. I found her mix of bluegrass, funk, R&B and rock to be absolutely brilliant.

Seriously, she had the audience in her hands.

Although there isn't an official video for her song Wanna Be On Your Mind, I still invite you to sit a spell and enjoy my personal favorite from her 2013 debut album Pushing Against A Stone.

THE 80'S

I have to admit that it hurt just a little bit when I saw on the news earlier that 35 years ago today, the first Sony Walkman appeared on store shelves.

Actually, it hurt quite a bit because I owned several of them throughout the greatest decade of the 20th century. I purchased my first one in 1983, along with two Pat Benatar cassettes, Live From Earth, and Get Nervous. For some strange reason, even though I had already made my purchase, I asked my mom from the backseat of our car if I could buy one. She said no and when I asked why, she replied "Because I said so." 

I rolled my eyes and as she drove, I quietly opened the packaging of my now contraband music player, installed the batteries, inserted the cassette into the player and hit the fast forward button to Love Is A Battlefield.

Such a rebel, huh?

LOVE IS A BATTLEFIELD

Ladies and gentlemen, I present the music video from the first song I ever heard on a Walkman, Pat Benatar's Love Is A Battlefield.

You're welcome.

THE HANGOVER

We laughed, we cried, we kissed four hours goodbye - okay, maybe three and a half. Anyway, here is how I saw the show last night, which I have to admit, was pretty good.

The "Selfie" heard 'round the world.

Pharrell Williams Happy, from the animated film Despicable Me 2, didn't win the award for Best Original Song, but maybe it should have. I downloaded it during the telecast and it's my new favorite song.

“ . . . And I have to say one of the most amazing Liza Minnelli impersonators I have seen in my entire life. Just really, seriously, good job, sir.” Liza is clearly annoyed with the joke but her sister, Lorna Luft (left) looks like she almost peed in her dress from laughing so hard. Best joke of the night.

The Oscars chose to mark the 75th anniversary of the 1939 classic film The Wizard of Oz and Pink did a damn good job with her rendition of Over The Rainbow, but I'm confused about why this particular film was singled out. 1939 is generally considered to be the year Hollywood turned out its finest films (Gone With The Wind; Gunga Din; Stage Coach; Mr. Smith Goes To Washington; Goodbye, Mr. Chips; etc), and a tribute to that entire year would probably had been more appropriate.

HORSE RACE

"In a horse race like the Oscars, bloodlines count, and Liza's got the bloodlines."

-- Rock Hudson before announcing Liza Minnelli as winner of the Best Actress in a Leading Role at the 1972 Oscar ceremony.

Hudson's cringe-inducing banter was in reference to that years so-called Horse Race between Best Actress nominees Liza Minnelli for Caberet and Diana Ross for Lady Sings The Blues. For whatever reason, the Best Actress category is often referred to as a Horse Race. It is rather offensive if you think about it, but so be it.

My personal favorite Horse Race for Best Actress is the one that took place in 1950. The list for that year was particularly good:

Bette Davis for All About Eve

Anne Baxter for All About Eve

Gloria Swanson for Sunset Boulevard

Judy Holliday for Born Yesterday

Eleanor Parker for Caged

This is a pretty amazing list of actresses to choose from but in my humble opinion, the only Horse Race that year was between Judy Holiday and Gloria Swanson, and here's why: 

Eleanor Parker never stood a chance. Caged is a campy romp about women in prison. Although it's pretty laughable today, the film was also nominated for Best Picture and Best Supporting Actress (Hope Emerson).

Go figure.

All About Eve is probably one of the best written film scripts ever! Bette Davis desperately wanted to be the first actress to win three Oscars for Best Actress and felt that Anne Baxter should have been submitted in the Best Supporting Actress category. Anne Baxter disagreed, correctly reminding everyone that she was the title character, although with the appearance of both actresses in the same category, they sort of canceled each other out.

Gloria Swanson's appearance in Sunset Boulevard was a major comeback. A superstar from the silent era, Swanson hadn't been seen on the big screen in years, and anyone who has seen Sunset Boulevard would agree that her mesmerizing performance is absolutely Oscar-worthy.

Last up, Judy Holliday for Born Yesterday. To win an award, you only need a minimum of 21% of the vote and I really think that's how Holliday was able to take home the Oscar for Best Actress.

Although she was openly disappointed she didn't win, Davis was quoted as saying "Oh good, a new comer" when Holliday was announced the winner. When Baxter later said that maybe she should have agreed to have been submitted for the Best Supporting Actress category, Davis is reported to have replied:

"Yes, you should have."

TRIBUTE

Best military recruitment film ever!

Best college film ever!

Best golfing film ever!

Best family vacation film ever!

And they were all written and/or directed by Harold Ramis, who sometimes acted in them, too. Ramis passed away today at the age of 69.

So long, Harold. You did real good.

48TH STATE

"I think anybody that owns a business can choose who they work with or who they don't work with...That's America. That's freedom."

-- Arizona Governor Jan Brewer

Actually Jan, that's not America, that's discrimination.

With a 33-27 vote, the Arizona legislature passed Senate Bill 1062, which re-defines and expands the state's definition of "exercise of religion" and "state action" to protect businesses, corporations and people from lawsuits after denying services based on a sincere religious belief and has been targeted at gays and lesbians.

Hmm, so they're using a "sincere religious belief" as a weapon of state-sponsored discrimination, huh?

My, how Christian.

This is going to be an easy boycott.

NEVERMIND

So Aberdeen, Wa., the hometown of the late singer Kurt Cobain, unveiled a statue of their native son that has some folks scratching their heads.

Yeah, I'm sort of scratching my head, too.

Not only does it appear to be shedding a single tear (sigh), but the statue also seems to resemble the lead singer of the Canadian rock group Nickelback more than it does Cobain.

Ouch.

THE BOOB TUBE

I suppose this posting could have been better timed since The Tonight Show torch was recently passed on to Jimmy Fallon, but so be it.

Back in the early 90's -- when he was funny -- Ben Stiller had a sketch comedy show on FOX that was damn funny. Created by Stiller and Judd Apatow, The Ben Stiller Show lasted just 13 episodes before it unceremoniously canceled.

This particular sketch was aired just as the ugliness over who was going to replace Johnny Carson as host of the venerable late-night show was in full swing. Jeanne Garafalo's imitation of how Sinead O'Connor's audition might have gone had she actually auditioned is beyond hilarious -- and spot on.

STRANGER IN PARADISE

The following is from the February 18 edition of the New York Times' Metropolitan Diary:

Dear Diary:

After hours of pecking away at her laptop and conversing on her cellphone, the attractive woman at an Upper East Side Starbucks was packing up at closing time.

As we braced for the late January freeze, she told me she was in a jam: She had left her wallet, cash, ID, credit cards and key to her boyfriend’s flat at her home in Boston, and was weak with hunger.

I invited her for a late sandwich in a diner. She shared her story: Drama major, aspiring screenwriter. She was in New York to discuss a screenplay and to try to make her roller-coaster relationship with her boyfriend work. In Boston, she was in rehearsal for a Tennessee Williams play.

Soon enough, I was passing ten $20 bills across the table, along with my address. She thanked me profusely and assured me that the loan would be repaid. I had my doubts.

At 7 the next morning, she called. She was again at the local Starbucks and wanted to repay the loan.

I joined her. “I was glad to be helpful,” I said. “I guess things worked out with your boyfriend.”

“Not really,” she replied. “We actually broke up yesterday afternoon, but before I left him, I locked up my wallet, cash and credit cards at his apartment so that I could do that exercise last night.”

“What exercise was that?” I asked.

“Oh, the one in which I was trying to understand what it was like to be Blanche DuBois and rely on the kindness of strangers.”

This would only happen in New York City.

Oh man, I love that town!

BRIDGEWORK

So over the last few months, the newly-opened eastern span of the San Francisco-Oakland Bay Bridge has been plagued with several safety issues, such as broken bolts and poorly manufactured and installed support rods. As if that wasn't enough, it was also revealed earlier this week that rainwater is leaking into the bridge, causing corrosion.

In spite of what increasingly appears to be a very poorly-built bridge, today's edition of SFGATE is reporting that the contractor, American Bridge/Fluor Enterprises, has been paid $49 million in bonuses, including $20 million for completing the bridge on time.

What. The. Fuck?

SKYFALL

This clip of a GoPro camera's fall from a plane is pretty hilarious. Not only does it survive the drop, but it lands in a pig pen and almost instantly becomes an afternoon snack.

SHARON JONES & THE DAP KINGS

From an album full of awesome songs, Retreat! is absolutely the most fucking awesomest song of the bunch.

The video is pretty cool, too.

Give The People What They Want is the latest (well, sort of latest, it dropped last October) from a singer who NEVER disappoints, Sharon Jones and the Dap Kings.

You're welcome.

DIG IF YOU WILL THE PICTURE

A couple of shots that I think turned out quite nice.

SCARFACE

Okay, so I caught the 80's classic Scarface on the big screen last night and I just have to say this:

Michelle Pfeiffer, you were so robbed of an Oscar!

That is all.

THE FAB FIVE

A lot has been written lately regarding the recent 50th anniversary of The Beatles appearance on The Ed Sullivan Show. That's nice and all but what I want to know is why the 30th anniversary of Duran Duran's Seven and the Ragged Tiger concert tour (which I saw at the Oakland Coliseum) has gone virtually ignored by the media?

I was a pretty big fan of Duran Duran back in the day. In fact, I'm still enough of a fan that when a song of theirs pops up on my iPod, I sometimes have to violently struggle to keep from doing The New Wave, the quintessential 80's dance move.

If you pay close attention, you'll see a fan in the audience of this concert clip performing it.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the first video in our celebration of the 30th anniversary of Duran Duran's arrival in America, The Reflex.

You're welcome.

DIG IF YOU WILL THE PICTURE

Here are a couple of shots I captured this past week.

DIG IF YOU WILL THE PICTURE

California winter.

BUS STOP

So a lot has been written lately about the protests against companies like Google, Facebook, Genentech and others that are using Muni bus stops to pick up and drop off workers with their shiny commuter buses.

I'm not really sure what the issue is?

With an estimated 18,000 employees using these shuttles, I can only imagine just how bottle-necked our already crowded streets and freeways would be if just HALF of these workers were driving to and from San Francisco every single day. Besides, Muni on-time rates, according to a 2012 study, are a paltry 57.2%, so it's not like these stops are being utilized anyway.

LOVE WILL KEEP US TOGETHER

Apparently not.

70's pop duo The Captain and Tennille (Toni Tennille and Darryl Dragon) announced yesterday they will be divorcing after 39 years of marriage.

I guess the 70's are now officially over.