TOUJOUR L'AMOUR, MIETTE

After a nice, long walk around The City this afternoon, my sweet tooth started aching, so I headed over to Miette (Octavia Street location) to buy JUST one small bag of licorice . . .

. . . at least, that's what the plan was supposed to be.

I did grab that one small bag of licorice, but also found the old-style packaging of Hersey's Milk Chocolate and canister of Ginger Snaps too irresistible to pass up.

Trick or treat, indeed.

LAST EXIT

Once the Oak Street exit from the long-gone Central Freeway, it is now the Hayes Valley Farm, an organic neighborhood farm/park. It's a pretty ingenious use of something once devoted to automobiles and pollution, and it'll be interesting to see how long it lasts.

The farm, technically, is on state-owned land and is smack in the middle of a neighborhood on an upward spiral, making it an incredibly valuable target for development.

MORNING HAS BROKEN

As seen from the headquarters of The Steaming Poop blog, earlier today.

FEED ME, SEYMOUR

The Fresh Market at Neiman-Marcus is quickly becoming my favourite sandwich shop.

On the plate today was the Presidio Sandwich (chicken breast with applewood-smoked bacon, melted cheddar, and avocado on toasted focaccia). Dijon on the side.

This lovely lunch was washed back with a sparkling Voss and topped off with a Lemon Cream Cheese cupcake.

Please, sir, may I have some more?

PEANUTS AND CRACKER JACK

Like all good things, the Giants come from New York City, and the last time they won the World Series was in 1954, when they swept the heavily-favored-to-win Cleveland Indians.

By the way, that's Willie Mays in the bottom picture, who's running catch in game 1 (with his back facing the infield), is still fondly remembered today.

The (now) San Francisco Giants (who moved to the west coast in 1958) are facing the Texas Rangers today. They're 2-up in the series and it would be pretty cool to see them repeat history and take the series in 4.

Fingers crossed.

8 MILLION STORIES IN THE NAKED CITY . . .

. . . and this is one of them.

I once had to use the phrase Apple Cinnamon Oatmeal as a password to attend Sean "Puff Daddy" Combs' after-party (following the VH-1 Music Awards in 2002) at Lotus.

PLEASE STAND CLEAR OF THE CLOSING DOORS

My absolute favourite part of New York City is the subway system. It's been called The Great Equalizer because the rich and the poor, the famous and not famous, all pay the same fare to get from point A to B. It's quicker than a cab and at $2.50, it's much cheaper as well.

The New York Times recently ran a photo essay that pays tribute to the public transporation that all New Yorkers love AND hate at the same time. Check it out, they included some great pictures.

SCARY MOVIE

The Steaming Poop's pick for the most frightening film ever made, just in time for Halloween.

ROSE TINT MY WORLD

One of Meg "Boom-Boom" Whitman's campaign themes has been about restoring the California Dream. She talks about how great this state was when her and her husband moved here in 1980.

Hmm, 1980, huh. I wonder who the governor was in 1980?

Oh wait, I know, I know: JERRY BROWN.

You have spent nearly $160 million dollars on a campaign that not only has you 8 points behind with less than a week before election day, but one of your campaign themes seems to point out an accomplishment of your opponent. You also failed to receive the endorsement of the current Republican governor.

Sorry, Meg, but it sounds to me like you're paying your campaign manager WAY TOO MUCH.

FEED ME, SEYMOUR

"How adventurous are you feeling tonight?"

That was my question to Logan before we set out on the search for a burger joint I had recently read about, but had no idea where along Hesperian Boulevard in San Lorenzo it was (I didn't even know the name of the place).

We found Sam's Burgers pretty easily and enjoyed the old-school stand very much.

STUPID STUFF STUPID WHITE PEOPLE LIKE

The Air-Sex World Championship was held recently at The Independent in San Francisco.

Really?

I'm looking at the picture of the guy above and thinking he's single and staying that way.

THE MOST RIDICULOUS CITY IN THE WORLD IS . . .

San Francisco (again).

There was some excitement about Trader Joe's locating in the former Tower Records site on Market at Noe Streets, an area that could use a store to compete with the terrible Safeway and terrible and expensive DeLano's Market. As usual, the NIMBY's got their panties in a bunch about traffic and parking (there is some limited parking on the roof of the building).

City Hall wanted to discourage short-distance drivers, so it asked that Trader Joe's charge for parking. Rightfully so, TJ's said no thank you, and have now abandoned the project. So instead of a small grocery store, the neighborhood got a Goodwill Store.

Way to go, San Francisco.

BLANK CHECK

$160 million spent on her vanity campaign and she's still 8 points behind in the polls, with one week left in the race for governor.

You're not getting a whole lot of bang for your buck there, are you, Meg?

TRIBUTE

Laugh as loud as you want, bitches, but this was how we rolled back in the 80's.

Sony has announced it will cease production of its legendary Walkman personal cassette player (I have to admit, I didn't know they were still making them). They will, however, continue to manufacture their MP3 version of the classic music player.

I bought my first one in 1983, along with two Pat Benatar cassettes, Get Nervous and Pat Benatar: Live From Earth. While sitting in the backseat with my stealth purchase (she had no idea I had just bought it), I asked my mom if I could buy one. She said No. "What if I paid for it myself," I replied. She gave me an impatient NO answer.

I rolled my eyes, put on the headphones, and blasted Love is a Battlefield.

TEST DRIVE

Once again, patience has it's virtue.

My rental from Hertz wasn't ready on-time, so after a 20 minute wait, I was given the Infinity FX35. Yes, it's an SUV (a type of automobile that represents everything I'm against), but I absolutely LOVED driving it.

Also, having Doris, the Goddess of Parking smile upon me the entire weekend made it an even more enjoyable experience.

It was so choice.

TOUJOUR L'AMOUR, MIETTE

The Vanilla Tomboy Cake from Miette.

Happy birthday, Mom.

LUCK BE A LOONEY TONIGHT

While addressing a group from the local high school Hispanic club, Teabagger senatorial candidate (Nevada) Sharron Angle told the group "You know, I don't know that all of you are Latino, some of you look a little more Asian to me."

She believes that abortion should be illegal in all cases, including rape or incest, because having that baby is a part of God's plan for you.

Now, she's claiming to be Nevada's first Asian legislator. That's funny, because in her self-published autobiography Prairie Fire, she not only neglects to mention the Asian in her, she proudly claimed to be from German stock.

All this insanity leaves me with just one question to the Nevada Republican Party:

This is the best candidate you could come with to run against incumbent Harry Reid?

JUST SAYING, IS ALL

'Nuff said?

PICTURE THIS

Just a couple of shots from Highway 1 along the northern end of Sonoma County, taken earlier this year.

DOUBLE TROUBLE

This is, quite possibly, the BEST political campaign commercial ever.

California gubernatorial candidate Jerry Brown's latest ad does what a political ad is supposed to do. This clip shows his Republican opponent, Meg "Boom-Boom" Whitman, in a bad light without having to sling any mud. She sinks herself with her own words.

Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.

I'M NOT A DOCTOR, BUT I PLAY ONE ON TV

They play high schoolers on TV but are in their mid to late 20's in real life, so I'm not sure why there are those out there who are now screaming that this cover (and the inside pics) promotes pedophilia?

It's pretty sick when you think about it. I mean, this really says a lot about the people who are so upset about this. If that was the first thing that popped into their heads when they saw the photo spread, then it says WAY more about them than I'd like to know.

RAIDER NATION

There are a few perks that go along with your dad owning a radio station.

Back in the day, the Oakland Raiders training camp was up in Santa Rosa. It's also where 106.5 FM KMLS broadcast from (my dad's station). The Raiders would spend a couple of weeks in August at the El Rancho Tropicana Hotel and hold their practice's in an adjacent field. At night, while most of the team would raise hell around town (and raise hell is an understatement), two players would guest DJ at my dad's station under the show title "JOCK ROCK."

My dad was able to arrange for my brother and I to visit their training camp one afternoon. We got to meet coach Tom Flores and players Dan Pastorini (who was a prick), Henry Lawrence, and Jim Plunkett. Jim was pretty cool. He actually stopped, shook our hands, and made some nice chit-chat with us. Awesome.

Mike Hererra (who was from the team's front office) was pointing out a few players of the players to us. I didn't recognize some of them (I was pretty old school and was missing Kenny Stabler, Lyle Alzado and John Matuszak), which caused him to jokingly ask "are you sure you're a Raider fan?"

Well, it was already 95 degrees at 10am, I was wearing my heavy Silver and Black jacket and sweating profusely (to the point of almost passing out), so yeah, I was a fan.

I'm still shaking my fist in the air over the fact that NO ONE thought to bring a camera to record this momentous event. (sigh)

IT'S DEJA VU, ALL OVER AGAIN (MAYBE)

The last time the New York Yankees and the San Francisco Giants faced each other in the World Series was back in 1962. The Yankees took the pennant that year.

Duh.

I'm not feeling confident about the prospects for a repeat of that series this year (Yankees aren't playing their best right now against the Texas Rangers), but it would be pretty awesome to see these once crosstown rivals together again.

Remember, like all good things, the Giants come from New York (and haven't won a world series since).

WITCHY WOMAN

During a senatorial debate with her Democrat opponent, Republican candidate (Delaware) Christine O'Donnell asked "Where in the Constitution is separation of church and state?" When told that it was the First Amendment that established the separation, she replied "The First Amendment does? . . . So you're telling me that the separation of church and state, the phrase 'church and state,' is in the First Amendment?"

Really? REALLY?

Her campaign later released a statement saying O'Donnell "was not questioning the concept of separation of church and state as subsequently established by the courts. She simply made the point that the phrase appears no where in the Constitution."

Subsequently established by the courts, huh? (sigh)

If you're going to run for office, there ought to be some kind of test that candidates should be required to take. A basic one, if you will, that tests their knowledge of how government works, maybe throw in some simple Constitution trivia, perhaps? I mean, you have to take a road AND written test before you get a drivers license, but any Joe Sixpack or Sally Housecoat with enough time on their hands can run for office.

Ms. O'Donnell, while not one of my "poopers," does read my blog occasionally, so I'm going to take a minute to school her on the First Amendment. I have a copy of it in my home, by way of a book everyone should own a copy of, A Patriots Handbook by Caroline Kennedy.

So with that said, here goes:

"Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances."

Christine, when you lose this election, you might want to take a few night courses to brush up on the high school civics lessons you have clearly forgotten.

INTO THE WILD

A "Schmason" was spotted in the outback yesterday. Usually one for cookies and cookie-related treats, he was photographed eating something healthier - a pear.

We all ice skated home after work, as the consumption of this natural snack was a sure sign that Hell had completely frozen over.

FOR THE BOYS (AND GIRLS)

If you drive an SUV with one of these stickers on the back, then you don't support the troops.

The last time this country really got together for a cause was a huge one, World War II. Food and gasoline was rationed, the recycle rate was nearly 95%, and Americans really sacrificed (even chewing gum was given up by most so it could be given out to troops on the battlefield).

My, how times have changed.

With two wars raging in the Middle East, we weren't asked to sacrifice anything. Instead, we were told to go shopping. The troops were poorly protected and armed. We were lied to about those who served (Pat Tillman and Jessica Lynch), and then the government slashed the Veterans Administration budget by $900 million dollars.

Actions speak louder than words. A perfect example is Petaluma veterinarian Russ Gurevitch. Take a look this story. He did a pretty cool thing and it got me to think that I could do a little more than I have (which wasn't much).

I'm not some rabid flag-waving hawk, but as someone who was at the World Trade Center that day (which was the genesis for these wars), the least I could do is ask how I can help. So I am and think you should ask yourself the same thing.

FEED ME, SEYMOUR

The Baby Burger at Burger Joint, Valencia and 19th.

TEA TIME

I don't understand why these people are so upset? Tax rates are at their lowest since 1960, so I'm a little confused about their feeling of being over-taxed. Do they not realize that the roads they drive their gas-guzzling SUV's on were built with money from tax collection?

The teabaggers have shown that they're nothing more than a bunch of selfish, angry, racist WHITE suburbanites who just can't let go of the fact that a black man was elected President.

2010 is on track to become the first year where minority births outnumbered Caucasian births. I think the only thing these people are pissed off about is that they will no longer be the majority and that they may have to start answering to someone who's skin tone has a little more hue than their own.

Oh well, turnabout is fair play.

FEED ME, SEYMOUR

After a particularly shit-filled week, I felt the need to be taken care of, so I went out and had my favourite kind of lunch . . .

. . . a free one.

Having recently reached a certain spending level at Neiman-Marcus, I was sent a $25 gift card that I spent on a Peppercorn Turkey Club Sandwich, a sparkling Voss water and a Snickerdoodle cookie.

Aaaaaahh, I'm feeling much better now.

PICTURE THIS

The sunrise, as seen from my window this morning.

Nice, huh?

DOWNGRADE

Southwest Airlines announced recently that it would soon eliminate the "premium service" offered on it's recently-acquired rival AirTran. Big deal, right?

It sort of is, as there is now a long-line of competitors who are scaling back the (i.e. my) beloved First Class service. In an attempt to boost profits, some airline executives have hinted they may end the service completely.

WTF?

If this is true, then I'm not seeing many airline trips in my future.

The time as come for the airlines to just slap a sticker on their planes that says "a subsidiary of Greyhound Bus Lines, Inc" and call it a day.

WISE GUY

"The world is three drinks behind."

- Humphrey Bogart

V-A-L-T-R-E-X

Alcoholic TV skank Snooki (or Snoozi, as I like to call her) has signed a book deal.

I know this is an old joke, but here goes: aren't you supposed to know how to spell before you can write a book?

WHAT IF IT WAS YOUR KID?

With the recent spat of gay-teen suicides, schools across the U.S. have been taking a second look at their anti-bullying policies and in one community, it's causing the Christian conservatives to prove, once again, that they are ANYTHING but Christian.

In July of this year, 15-year old Justin Aaberg of Andover, Mn, hanged himself after years of being taunted for his sexual orientation. The superintendent of the school district where Justin attended high school is one of those taking that second look at their anti-bullying policies. This has area conservatives in such an uproar over the fear of the GAY AGENDA creeping into the school district's curriculum that it has caused the superintendent to say he may invite the U.S. Justice Department in to possibly mediate a resolution.

The local "Christian" organization, the Minnesota Family Council, has had this to say:

"We believe the bullying policy should put the emphasis on the wrong actions of the bullies and not the characteristics of the victims"

Hey MFC, guess what? I don't care what you believe about the policies. You guys are always screaming about the GAY AGENDA being forced on everyone. Well, you know what? I'm tired of having the CHRISTIAN AGENDA being forced on everyone.

Just in case you didn't know, it is the responsibility of schools to keep ALL students safe and to reasonably protect them from ALL forms of harassment. Any school administration that refuses to do less than that and/or caves into the desperate, baseless, and hysterical claims of these Christians is just, in my bold opinion, washing their hands with the blood of the next victim.

The time has come for you to pull your heads out of your asses and ask yourself:

"What if it was MY kid?"

PICTURE THIS

From earlier this year.

Snake River Canyon, Twin Falls, Idaho.

GODZILLA!

I came across this amusing little piece of "art" this afternoon that I'll call Dolores Parktopus.

WHY I OUGHTA!

Saturday morning, fresh coffee, a cereal bar, peas on the knees, and The Three Stooges on IFC?

Weekend bliss.

AND I APPROVED THIS MESSAGE

I will NOT be voting for Meg Whitman next month.

GIRL CRUSH REDUX

(clip courtesy of helloyummy)

PEAS FOR THE KNEES

I'm following doctors order, literally.

I was happy to be told that I don't need surgery since my meniscus isn't torn, as originally thought. The MRI shows swelling and fluid on the knee, so he prescribed an anti-inflammatory and an ice pack for 20 minutes, twice a day.

He really did say "just use a bag of peas and toss 'em back in the freezer."

I love it when it's easy.

THE ART OF CUSTOMER SERVICE

More often than not, the customer service I receive is pretty poor. Nothing bothers me more than to have a situation not owned by the representative or sales person I'm dealing with.

However, there are times when I'm absolutely knocked out by the service I receive and today, I'm saluting Edward at Neiman-Marcus for that very reason.

Earlier this year, I bought a pair of Ray-Ban Wayfarers (Square-cut) and they weren't cheap, $180 to be exact. They broke recently, and I was unable to repair them myself. I brought them back to NM to see if they could help me.

At first, Edward (my salesperson) offered to have them repaired and when it looked like the repair wouldn't be done until Monday, he decided to do an exchange, instead. Unfortunately, there wasn't another pair in the stockroom, so Edward went ahead and swapped them for another pair.

I hesitated for a moment and noted that they weren't quite the same. He agreed and then said that the new style I was getting was more contemporary and would wear longer.

I love that.